I started my period the summer of going into seventh grade. I was in the car on a trip with my dad, brother, and uncle to spend the day with my grandparents. My body began feeling uncomfortable and I knew that I needed to go to the bathroom. We stopped at a Burger King to use the restroom and to get some lunch. I soon discovered that something was not quite right. A brown and reddish looking mess was in my undies and I knew quickly that I had started my period. I grabbed a wad of toilet paper and stuffed it in my underwear in the hopes that I would make it until we were at my grandparents.
I remember feeling embarrassed and ashamed of my body. It wasn’t until we got to the house that I told my dad and we went back out to get new underwear and some pads. The selections felt overwhelming and as we checked out I felt flustered. I didn’t want anyone to know that my body was changing in a way that felt gross and unwanted. I then had to call my mom to have her help explain to me what kind of pads I needed and how to use them. My period was never treated as a big deal like in many traditions, but I always felt shameful anytime I would mention it.
Why is the topic of menstruation so taboo? Many women in different cultures and religions face strict and harmful restrictions due to misinformation and the hateful nature menstruation has been given. In many other countries girls miss several days of school out of the month and many drop out due to lack of sanitary pads and understanding. There is a great TED talk by Aditi Gupta that goes through many of the issues girls and women face by keeping the topic of menstruation taboo. She has created a wonderful comic book to help girls learn more about periods and how it will affect their bodies. Definitely check out her work and watch her TED talk here: https://www.ted.com/talks/aditiguptaataboofreewaytotalkabout_periods/up-next
I remember my own understanding of periods in a western public school was limited and not given much thought. By the time sex ed and the menstrual cycle were taught to me, I had already gone through my period. It wasn’t until years later that I learned more about my own body and why I menstruate in the first place. It frustrates me that not much has changed and that a dialogue between girls and their parents, teachers, or other mentors is limited. If you are facing questions or want to learn new information, Planned Parenthood has a great breakdown of the menstrual cycle and how it all works. Take a look at their site for more information here: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/health-and-wellness/menstruation
When I go to buy pads and tampons I shouldn’t feel ashamed, but many times I do. This is a sad realization that I have contemplated and fought to change many times over the years. This kind of thinking needs to change and to start that I want to spread body positivity and factual information. Take charge of your body and your period. I have started doing this by keeping track of my own period each month. I have used several different trackers and found that I really enjoy using the app Dot (https://www.dottheapp.com). It allows me to learn about my cycle and is an easy interface to use. Explore for yourself different period trackers, as there are many free and paid apps. Whether you are trying to get pregnant or wanting to prevent pregnancy, knowing your own cycle can be extremely helpful and having that knowledge is powerful.
Don’t be afraid to talk about your period. Be proud and be compassionate. Also, keep in mind that there are some women who don’t get periods or stop having their period, called amenorrhea. (http://youngwomenshealth.org/2013/06/12/amenorrhea/) And that not everyone who gets a period identifies as a woman. “Transgender men and genderqueer people who have uteruses, vaginas, fallopian tubes, and ovaries also get their periods.” (Planned Parenthood) Everyone has their personal journey and the topic of periods should not be left taboo. Tell your menstrual story and let’s talk about the facts, period.